Ep131 Can women run million dollar companies and still have a life?

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Show Transcription: 

Can women run million dollar companies and still have a life? That is the question that I'm talking about today. Because as I have, over the last couple of years, really started doubling down on million dollar micro business and my goal of helping to create million dollar companies for women. I've had a lot of comments from people saying, you know, a lot of women don't go big, because they simply don't want to, because the fear is that you can't go big, and still have a life. And so a lot of women will pull back because they don't want to lose the life that they have. And so that's what I want to talk to you about today. Because you've probably heard the saying before, we can have it all, but we can't do it all. And there's different points and I think that I live in a beautiful bubble. I have a life less ordinary and what is very normal to me when I talk about my life to a lot of other women and a lot of other mums in business, especially. I met with like a guest and going, you do what? How? Seriously? And so that's what I wanted to share with you today. Because I think it is so important to be able to change the conversation and the way that men have traditionally built million dollar companies and the way that we have all been taught to build million dollar companies doesn't necessarily serve women. And it doesn't serve women especially that want to build companies while having babies. And while still having I mean we are wired so differently, we have cycles, both 28 day cycles and life cycles that have with our with our ovulating years and perimenopause and menopause and all of the things that we go through that instead of ignoring that, and fighting that, if we embrace that it can be our superpower. But it also means that the way that we've done business so that we don't hit burnout so that we don't hit adrenal fatigue so that we don't spend our lives constantly exhausted, we have to be able to do it differently. And so that is what we're talking about today. 

Hey, friend, and welcome to Episode 131 of her Empire Builder podcast. So let me tell you a story. I am so bloody passionate about women creating wealth about women being able to have everything that they want to be able to have in life. And I, ahead of my book launch tour have recorded pretty much every episode until the end of August except for one or two that I want to do on the fly that are pertinent to what's happening in the book launch tour and all of that sort of thing. And then I got back a couple of days ago from my retreat, my members only retreat for her Empire Builder. And we'd spent a week in Noosa and then got back and had one day's rest and then was like Okay, so we launched a book in nine days. There's a lot going on and there is a lot to do and this morning I had Jarrah my AE say to me, you know there's a podcast episode due that isn't recorded yet. We're gonna get that done. And I forgot that this was the one that I was supposed to do on the fly and I didn't do it when I did all my batching because it was one that I really wanted to think about a lot because I don't want to give you a bumpsteer and I want to give you as much value as I can of actionable steps. But the irony is I found this out today and I'm literally going so my day to day I have one sick child who stayed home, we had these dramas with our cleaner that came and she was sick and all of the all of the drama that goes on. And then you know, I had the dogs in the office because they had to be out of the house to get the cleaning done. Husband was surfing, I have to send out all of my pre-order books. So I've got to like sign 200 books with notes and everything, which is very hard on my hands. And then the media is all ramping up. So I've got to write five magazine articles. And then it was like, Okay, and then we're gonna do a podcast episode. And I'm still tired with the retreat, and we have a sneaky door opening for her Empire Builder until the end of financial year. So I had four application calls that I as well. And when my son came over to the office to say, hey, like, I'm a bit hungry, man. like writing notes, for the episode of can women run million dollar companies and still have a life. And I was like, you know, one, this episode was supposed to be recorded today.

Because sometimes my life can be so organized and put together that I can feel a little smug and just be like, you know what, I've got this shit all under control. Today is not one of those days. Today, I feel like there are so many different things and so many responsibilities, that I'm pulled in a million different directions. And when that happens, we have to be able to go, Okay, what do we need to do in order to not break, in order to be able to run a thriving company, and still have a life. And so that's what I really want to go through today. Because there are different things that I have done to be able to do that. And things that I think will be really helpful. 

Because I mean, the statistics are terrible. The percentage of women at the top is really, really small. And still, it's something like 92% of women led businesses make less than $100,000 a year. And when people tell me, Tina, the reason that more men make money in business than women is because men are ambitious, and women are not, I call bullshit. The thing is, we're still, you know, we're so lucky, like what we have the opportunity to do now as women, you know, because of the generations before us is astounding. But still, there are so many different societal expectations, and things that we have taken on that is so hard. And it means that it doesn't matter how ambitious you possibly are, if you are trying to do everything is simply too much. And this was the conversation I was having with someone the other day too, because you know that saying where people go, you know, if it's important to you, you'll find time for it, you've got enough time for all of the things that are most important to you in life. What do you do with everything's important?

You know, like, I go, Well, I want to walk the dog every day, I want to practice piano, I want to do my organic gardening, I want to do podcast interviews, I want to read to my kids, I want to cook dinner, I want to make love to my husband, I want to do my work, I want like there's not enough hours in the day for all of that. So you have to pick and choose. And it ebbs and flows with different seasons. And so I really want you to figure out like, do you want it? So when you chose to hit play on this podcast episode, there would have been some sort of intrigue there and going, you know, what, can I run a million dollar company and still have a life? And the answer is yes, absolutely. And I think that one of the things that I'm loving saying is more women rising to the top helping others to go with them and showing a different way of making that happen. So if you want it, you have to figure out why you want it. And then what is most important to you, because we can have it all but we can't do it all. And you know, one of the I haven't really publicly promoted it yet because there's too much going on with book launch. But if you go to womenonline.com.au if you're in Australia, we're running women online one day conference in August, which I have got together all of the women that I know that run seven figure a year businesses to share how they do it. Most of them are mums. Some of them have young kids, actually most of them have young kids. Because I think it's so important to go Okay, you know what, this is how I do it. And the interesting part is when I talk to these women, we all do it very, very differently. Because we all have different parts of our lives that are more important to us and for me, it's kind of like, you know what, what's most important is my kids, my husband, my team, my clients, and my health. That’s in nowhere in there, do all of the other 50,000 things come into it. And so my recommendation is, as soon as you start making money in your business, get some help. 

There are no, there's no point, like, no point in being a full on martyr, like, I have no interest in winning the medal for being able to handle more stress and pressure than anybody else. I do know that it requires work to build a big business. But you need to know at what point you can get help from somewhere else. So like for today, for example, everything that I said before that was happening, one of the other things was organizing a regular dog wash. So we moved in October last year, so that nine months ago, but we're still driving like 35-40 minutes away to the dog wash, because that's the dog wash that we were going to before and the dogs love it. But I'm like, you know what, we need to get a mobile dog wash because no one should be spending that time driving down. And so I was there like googling mobile dog washes and messaging people going, do you have availability? We've got a girdle and a sheepadoodle, can you come around? And then at one point, I've stopped and gone? Why am I doing this? Here, my husband's off surfing for a couple of hours? Why isn't he doing this? And it's because I didn't ask him to. And this is the thing that often happens is women and I'm not Pooh poohing my husband here, my husband's a legend, he helps me out in every single area. But he doesn't, he doesn't think of the things that I think of. And this is what I find with a lot of women is we have so many tabs open in our brains. And we're going okay, we're gonna do this, we're gonna do this, we're gonna do this, and everything's organized. And everything's there. And everything's kind of like all over the place. I know, you know what I'm talking about. Whereas men kind of don't have as many tabs, generally speaking. And so if I want him to take on a responsibility, all I have to do is ask, but I have to think to ask, and so straight away, I was like that, you know what? I don't have time to do this shit, can you take on the dogs, like just arrange, I'd love them to come every second Wednesday, like alternate dates to the gardener. And he's like, yep, I do it, I get it done. So then I don't have to think about it anymore. But I spent so much of my life, not asking for help, just going suffering through it just going oh, my gosh, I've got so many things on my list, I've got to do it all. So if you're feeling like that, and you've run out of time, work out what is most important to you, and what you can say no to. And look, I know that like I can sound like I've got a super busy lifestyle right now. I love talking about the gardener and the dog washer, and the cleaner and the different things, I am in a very privileged position where I am now. But it was not always that way, I spent 11 years on the poverty line going like my average income was $32,000. So I couldn't afford to do that sort of stuff. And so a lot of things, just let slip, a lot of things I would say you know what, that's not important to me. I don't care, I'm just not going to do it. And then as soon as I earn the money, I started to have the life that I'd always dreamed of having. And one of my favorite Oprah quotes is do what you've got to do until you can do what you want to do. And that is what we're working towards. So as soon as you start making money in your business, I would recommend outsourcing the things that don't bring you joy, or the things that are cheaper. 

So one of the things you know, I would rather do my graphic design work than clean the house, they're both about the same price, which is crazy to me. But if you can outsource, like your graphic design for $50 an hour or your cleaning for $50 an hour, look at those two things and go Okay, you know what, this is the amount of money I have, which one would I rather not do and outsource that thing first, then get the next slide, outsource the next thing. So I'm quite a frugal person, I don't really waste a lot of money or spend a lot of money on things. What I do buy is time, I will spend a lot of money buying time because that is the most precious thing. Like you heard the values that I have. And I dare say you've got very similar ones in your relationships and your kids and your health and your team and your clients to do that and show up the best that you possibly can. You need time and energy. And so it's being able to kind of get the other parts of life taken care of so that you can do the things that are most important to you and so that you can do the things that are going to get the best return. So just as an example, the ways that I have help in my life, I have a personal assistant. So Jarrah, who you've probably heard me talk about. And if you follow me on social media, you see her a lot. We just pulled off like the most epic conference with the two of us. So we're having a massive love fest at the moment in going, you're awesome. You're awesome. Oh, my God we’re so awesome. But there are so many parts of my life that Jarrah takes care of both for business and personal. And it's so incredibly helpful. Is it expensive? Yes. But what is the cost of not doing it? And so for me, if I have to pay her to be able to do that, and this is the conversation I have with a lot of people is going, you know what, I would rather keep 100 grand a year for myself, rather than a staff member. And you can look at that. And look, I'm in that exact situation, right now, I know I need another staff member, but I look at it and go, would I rather that money in my pocket or their pocket. But there's only so far that we can get solo. And so there comes a point where you've got to go, if you're too tired, and you've run out of time, the only way we can rise, the only way we can continue to grow and evolve our companies is with our brain power. So you can do everything that you can to protect that brain power and that creativity. And you can tell that I need that because for those of you who are regular listeners, you've noticed, I've like stumbled over my word couple of times today. Usually things roll off my tongue quite simply, but I'm tired. And I know that I need help. And so instead of suffering through it, I then actually love these moments that I get to that level of exhaustion. Because what it does is it makes me take this beautiful look at everything on my plate and go Alright, what is really important to me that I have to keep on here, that's going to be my responsibility, and what can I give away or not worry about or delegate or hire for? 

So anyway, let me get back to my list of how I get help, just to see, or just because I want to be honest with you. I know that sometimes I can look at people who are running seven figure businesses and go oh my god, like they seem to do it so easily. But it's because as the business has grown, the help has grown as well, which enables you to do more. So I have a personal assistant or an EA, you know, depends what you want to call them. I have a gardener that does the mowing and the hedges and all of that sort of thing. Because it's a big job. We live on acreage. And I don't want to spend time on doing that. I just like to do the fun part in my organic garden. And I don't want my husband to have to do that. So one of the conditions, I wanted to move to acreage and he was like I'm not losing like a day a week on mowing. So I said, All right, that's fine. I'll get that taken care of. So the other ways we get help, we have hellofresh, which is like meal delivery and then my husband and kids cook that, the laundry, I don't do any laundry ever. So either my husband does it for me. Or if like the case that I've just got back from running our conference. So I have literally two suitcases filled with dirty laundry. We put that out and we get the laundromat to pick it up at $19 washing basket fold, they wash it beautifully. It comes back all pressed and folded, ready just to go straight away. So you know, I was talking to a girlfriend the other day, she has four teenage sons, she's like, that would not work for me because we literally have two or three loads a day. That's too expensive. But like my kids do their own laundry, they're 11 and 13. And they do their own, that's their responsibility. So everyone's got to take their part and this kind of comes into my next point is our family as a team. They're not dependent upon me as the woman and the mother in this family unit. And that has been how they’ve been raised the whole way through so I'll often have people say to me, how do you get your kids to do the things that they do? And it's because that's that's how it's been since the beginning. I'm not sure. Like I think if that was introduced now when they're the age they are it'd be really hard.

But we've always been raised of you know, life is a team sport and to make it work everyone's got to do their part and they know that I have a lot going on and that's totally fine. They don't look to me to fulfill all of their needs. The need that I feel as their mama is I am their love. You know if they need a big warm hug, that's me, I'm here. We have quality conversations. We do a lot of different things together. But the way that I, i mean I always joke around and go I'm kinda like how grandfather’s generation, you know, when they just you see them, and you hear jokes and people will go, you know, the dads get to take all the fun parts. So I think a lot of the time, both my husband and I get the fun parts of parenting, you know, we don't do a lot of the admin. So I'll talk to people all the time, they like, you know, I spent like four or five hours a day on admin, like packing lunches. And I don't know, I like everything else that's done in the house.

I don't know all of this stuff. But your mornings in our house are really chilled, we wake up, we have morning cup of tea together, we chat, we laugh about the day we talk about what's going on, it's a really nice slow start to the day. And that is because our kids are responsible for packing their own lunches and getting that all sorted. And it's not a drama, it's not a big deal. It's just part of what they've got to get organized. And it means that that onus isn't upon me. So it's not something that I'm feeling weighted upon my shoulders. And so I want you to look at what parts of your life are heavy, and how can you lighten that load. I am also a calendar ninja. So I am very, very strict with my boundaries and my calendars. So a lot of the time. I mean, at the moment, we're in a really busy season. And I'm okay with that we planned for that. Normally, I work Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and I take off Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. That's a normal week, and then one week a month off. So that's like the normal rhythm. But then at the moment, there's like the three months of the year that are big. And we're right smack bang in that right now where I'm like five or six days a week working. And that's okay, because I know that we get to September, that all stops like we've got, we just had our retreat. Next month we're launching a book, then next month, we have women online, then next month, we launch her Empire Builder. And then that closes and we've kind of got five months then with no launches, no publicity, nothing except just loving upon our community and our clients and getting that all back again. So it's being able to kind of plan around that. And then knowing that you're going to have that recovery time because if you sprint and you sprint, day after day, week after week, month after month, oh my gosh, like that's just it's not sustainable. I can't believe we had Keri Krieger speak at our conference last week, who's a wellness expert. And she asked the question, how many people in the room have had adrenal fatigue, and I reckon three quarters of the hands went up. And this is why I think women are reluctant to run million dollar companies, I think, because the sheer thought of taking on more, more pressure, more risk, more responsibility, just more is just too much. And so until we can figure out how we can have more joy and ease in life, that next level of business isn't going to come. 

And so I love routine, I think routine is the best friend for expectations and calm flow. And a lot of people are reluctant to have a routine because it's a little boring. But what it does is it gives you pockets of time that you can know everything's taken care of, and then have more creativity than without routine. Because without routine, everything's a cluster, or I shouldn't shouldn't say the F bomb, but you get what I was going to say there, right.

But when we've got routine, it means that everything just has calm flow, so that you can have these these beautiful pockets of time where you go, you know what I can do whatever I want now, and I can think creatively, and I can do all of the things to level up in the business. Because so often I see women doing the things that they need to do to survive, rather than thrive. And that's what I know needs to happen for women to either overtake or be on par with the business performance that we see men having. So when you're looking at, you know, what can you do to run a million dollar company? I do think that it's the easy things. I think it's starting with the small things and going how can we like offload the things that are being really heavy? And often I see women, you know, going well, I want to build this seven figure company. And it just looks bigger than bigger than Ben Hur. You know, it's so many different things. But what got you've heard the saying, like what got you here won't get you there. And it changes all the time like what it takes to build a business that makes $100,000 a year. Really different to what it takes to build a business that is 500,000 and then a million and then million and a half, it's all going to be different. So the best thing to do is go, Okay, how can I serve people beautifully on a small scale? Get it to 100,000? And then go alright, to go to that next level, what do I have to let go of? What do I have to change? Who can I hire now? How can I adapt? Love the process going through. So if you, you know, if you're sitting there and you're going, you know, I don't want to serve people, I don't want to work with my customers, I just want something that's just going to run on its own and be passive. And let me live my life. It's never going to get there, let me tell you that. It is just not going to happen. But if you love the process, and you go, I'm going to say, Yes, I am going to do the work, I am going to do what it takes to get to that six figures, I think the first like 200 - 250,000 is the hardest. It is definitely the hardest way to get there. Because you're doing so much yourself. You don't yet have the finances to be able to outsource and get all of the help that you need. And so you’re saying yes. And so what my advice is, is sprint to that as quickly as you can. And the way you do that is by actually focusing small, not big is actually focusing on your individual customers and going how can I get you kick ass results? How can I get you the transformation that I have promised you that I will get and then some because that's what happens in online programs is it takes traction, and it takes hold, and then it just flies from there. And so if you focus on the small things and getting to that stage, then once you get past like that 200 to 300,000, things actually start getting a lot easier. And I always say it's really, really unfair, because all of the help that I have now, it makes my life so much easier. But I don't need it as much as I did at the beginning. Like, where was all this, then like that's the hard part. And so you got to do everything that you tend to get past that. Because once you hit, especially once you hit a million, oh, you can breathe, the space that you can have and the life that you can have, it's beautiful. But I'm going to put another saying in here that I had stuck on my wall for years and years and years. And it was a way for me to get through the hard years, because I knew that there was light at the end of the tunnel. And the saying is Entrepreneurship is living a few years of your life, like most people won't,

so that you can live the rest of your life, like most people can't. And what I think holds the most people back is thinking that it should be easier than it is. Because often we feel like it's easy for everybody else. But it's not. It's hard. And if you're feeling like it's hard now you're not really doing anything wrong. The road to it is hard. But what I don't want for you is to get stuck in the hard forever.

I want you to get over that precipice. I want you to get to that next level where it's uncrowded. And you can feel that ease. Because as you grow, you've been saying yes to every opportunity saying yes, yes, yes, yes, I can take that client on. Yes, I can do that. Yes, I'll change that product. Yes, I can take that off up. And then you get to start saying no. And I see people saying no, too early. Because at the beginning, you do have to say yes, but then it's knowing when you get to that level that you go, you know what the yes is no longer serving me, I will die if I say yes to one more thing. And so you have to then start saying no, and knowing who's most important to focus on, and those people are the people who are paying you. Today, I had an application call with a beautiful lady and she was saying, you know, so much of my time is spent. She's in social media management. And she'll get DMS all day on Instagram. How do I do this? How do I do that? How do I do this? What's your advice for this, and she beautifully responds to them. And this is all well and good at the start when you're building your audience and you're building that trust and that credibility. But if you continue with that, as the business grows, you've got no time and energy left, you completely tapped out. So then it's knowing where to put those boundaries in place to go, Oh, absolutely. I would love to help you. Here's the link that you can book in my coaching call with. And often we don't do those things as women because we don't want to be perceived as an asshole. And I know you've probably been in the position where you've said yes to something because you haven't wanted the person to think less of you or you haven't wanted the person to think because she does she thinks she is what she's too good for me now, you know, and that is a problem that we all go through.

But if you want to run a million dollar company and still have a life, you need to focus on the things that are most important to you so that you have enough time and energy, to thrive, to run this beautiful business, and to be the woman who can show the other women in your life and in your community, that it can be done that, yes, it looks different to how we've been shown for men for decades, because you look at a lot of successful men that have multimillion dollar companies and you know, they're on the road or they're gone in the office, and they're, they're gone for 10 or 12 hour days, five days a week. Most women don't want that life. Now, we want to be able to have babies on the hips, we want to be out to lunch with friends, we want to have a beautiful, balanced human experience where we get to do everything, where we get to go for runs on the beach with friends, where we get to run these care house businesses that serve people and impact the world. And you can do everything. But what got you here won't get you there. And you need to know at what point or how can I continue to adapt and ebb and flow so that I can run my million dollar company and live the life of my dreams. And that my friend is all in reach for you. 

So I hope that's helpful. Now, Million Dollar Micro Business, my new book, you've heard me talking about it a lot. It is out very, very soon, July 1 if you're listening to this episode live, and pre orders are so important to authors like more important than after the book is. So if I could ask you, if you could order a copy, if you are listening to this, you're obviously interested in online business and the book is written for you. So if you can go on to booktopia or Amazon or any bookstore and get a copy of Million Dollar Micro Business and to say thank you for pre-ordering, if you go to milliondollarmicrobusiness.com I've got a heap of free resources there for pre-orders. So there's a digital workbook that goes with it. There's a free masterclass. There's a few other things that I really should know. But they are all there to say thank you to you for pre-ordering it. And I know for pre orders they've been sent out from booktopia, like right now. So they will be in hands very, very soon. And I'll be honest, I'm gonna lose it when I see. And hopefully COVID gets under control. And we can hit the road and do our book tour as well. So if you want to come along, to book a tour you can go to tinatower.com/tour because I would love to meet you in real life. All right, have the best day.